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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Dallas Lundman Cuts His Vacation Short

Doylestown, PA resident Dallas Lundman had to cut his family vacation to Myrtle Beach short. According to eyewitnesses, Dallas Lundman answered his cell phone shortly after 10:37am while sunbathing next to his wife and 2 kids. Things escalated rather quickly, with Dallas standing up and then forcibly waving his arms. Eventually he exited the beach to continue his phone call in a Hooters parking lot.

Dallas returned to the beach and his family, visibly distraught, at 11:19am. At this point, he began to pack up his family's belongings. Marianne Lundman proceeded to tug on the blanket as Dallas was attempting to place it in "that huge ass bag that god damn family always brings", as travel companions the Flemings refer to it. Before too soon, there was yelling and screaming, and a little bit of sand kicking. Authorities were not called to the scene, though Mikey and Wendy needed consoling.

When asked for comment, Dallas denied the sand kicking. But he explained that his family's vacation had to be cut short because of "some jerkoff in Marketing who can't follow directions. I go on my first frickin' vacation in 10 years and that guy can't fill out a work order with the proper instructions. Dammit, I don't make nearly enough to put up with this bullshit. Thank God for them the economy is the shitter and that I'm too lazy to update my resume."

When informed that George Bush did not leave his vacation to deal with the crisis between Russia and Georgia, a clearly frustrated and outraged Dallas Lundman bellowed, "F$ckin' douchebag!"

Our eyewitness could not actually vouch for Dallas' return to work, as he continued to ogle bikini clad teens at the beach.

Tags:

funny silly spoof Bush vacation Dallas Lundman

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