Monday, March 10, 2008

Sam Eagle: McCain? Get Real!

My fellow Americans,

I am outraged. I can not comprehend how we are suppose to back this sissy back-stabber of a man who has lost his mind years ago. I just know what is going to happen to my beloved country and it's rightful leaders.

The only thing that can be said about McCain is that he is not one of them. You know who I am talking about. The terrorist lovers; The troop haters; those who hate this country and everything that it represents.

I received an e-mail last summer about a young man from Illinois. A Muslim who wanted to run for president of the United States. This is what Saddam and his Al Qaeda sympathizers wanted all along; One of theirs in the White House.

Now. I am shaking as I write this. My naturally blue (circulation problem) skin boiling red. Now... Now this guy has a shot of becoming our next president. Oh woe is me and my comrades who have made this country prosper. We are in some dire times.

I blame the media. They have destroyed those who formed the rock hard pillars of the conservative movement. Such fine outstanding individuals such as Larry Craig, Karl Rove, Rick Santorum, and many others. These men have given everything and only asked for graciousness. Instead they were paid in bile.

This is blood on your hands, wicked media (with the exception of my beloved Fox News channel). You have brought the end to the house that Reagan built.

So what are we to do now?

This McCain fellow is not a true conservative. Sure. He talks about keeping the taxes low so that the wealth may trickle down to the lowliest of the low so that they in turn can be pulled up from their bootstraps. But, will he do it?

I have my doubts and I am not alone. Limbaugh and the leggy Coulter (Oh how I would love to tangle my talons around her arms and make sweet blue haired eaglets.) have their doubts. I fear that they know he is not up to snuff.

McCain might be a worse fellow than the Frog. Although I never approved of his lifestyle (Kermit makes it with a pig after all.); At least Kermit had his good points. McCain has none.

Mark my words. He will extend his hand to the other side. And when he does... It will be like he is yanking my red beating heart from my chest!

We are the United States and the United States should never negotiate with terrorists. I fear this McCain fellow is more of a terrorist sympathizer than the blow-job king's wife!

I have said enough. I am not enthusiastic about our candidate. He doesn't excite me. I doubt that I will devote an entire wing of my home as a homage like I did with Reagan and Nixon.

But, I will be OK. I have my memories of the sweet innocent times when Michael J. Fox was a clean cut Conservative kid and Wham ruled the radio.

If and when our country ever does recapture it's soul. Won't you wake me up before I go go?

Sam Preston Eagle

This article was reprinted with much silliness from Real Clear Politics, a conservative political opinion web site.

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