The Cheatingest American Hero

It's cycling so I can't get that outraged. I mean, I've probably given cycling maybe an hours worth of my time in my life. And that's including that idiot Lance Armstrong*, his Livestrong bracelets, and his romance with Sheryl Crow. Still, this needs to be reported on since it's so craptastic.

Tour de France champion Floyd Landis tested positive for high levels of testosterone during the race, his Phonak team said Thursday on its Web site, raising questions about his victory.

This is just great. Another in the long line of temporary American heroes (what, like anyone would remember him 2 years from now - it's cycling) whose actions disgrace themselves. What kind of message does this send to the children - oh yeah, no one cares because it's cycling. Here's hoping this bum gets kicked out of the sport forever. Maybe they can do some trick video work and insert the new champion into all the videos of this idiot celebrating his cheating victory.

* Boo-hoo, I know I'm supposed to feel bad for Lance Armstrong because he had cancer and valiantly fought it off. But from my vantage point he lost that sympathy years ago for being a grade A class jerk. If I were going to a jerk store, he would be the first thing on my shopping list. Not to mention he's most likely a doping fiend who cheated himself to win and an asshole who left his girlfriend right when she discovered she had cancer. Feel free to disagree, but I can't stand this douchebag.

Tags: * comedy * humor * funny * silly * entertainment * pop culture * Tour de France * cycling * cheating * doping * Lance Armstrong * Sheryl Crow * Livestrong * jerk store * Floyd Landis * American hero