Dr. Bunsen Honedew: Global Warming and Pseudo Facts
Hello everyone,
I'm Dr. Bunsen Honeydew of Muppet Labs Inc. guest reporting for Life is Crap. Today we will be testing my random pseudo-facts generator, which I created to disprove Global Warming. Beaker, can you get retrieve the machine?
Bkr: Mememe?
DBH: Yes, right now. You can watch the rest of the Everwood Series Finale later.
Bkr: Sigh. Memmeme (pant) (pant) Memme
DBH: As you can see, I had to make the machine very big to accomodate more randomness. Anything can happen once we plug this baby in. Who knows, it might even work!
Bkr: Mememe!
DBH: Ok good. Let me put on my goggles. Beaker do you have your goggles on? Silly me, I never bought you any. Ok. Go ahead. Plug it in.
Bkr: Memmemem! Memmeme!
DBH: Of course, it's suppose to emmit smoke! Every pseudo-facts generator ever created spits out at least 8 tons of smog per minute. My model does 9! My heavens, it works! I built something that works!
Bkr: Memememe! (pant) Mememe! (sigh)
DBH: Oh right, I should put on my oxygen mask. Sorry Beaker, only scientists get oxygen masks.
Bkr: Gasp! Memm! Gasp!
DBH: Geez Louise, what a baby! Now is not the time to take a nap Beaker! Beaker? Beaker? Sigh. I guess I will have to get Beaker's replacement 90210's Luke Perry. Luke, come in here.
LP: Hi Doctor. Can we open the windows? It's a bit smokey in here.
DBH: I guess, but it will make the experiment a little less successful. Go ahead.
LP: Hmmm... someone jammed gum in the latch.
DBH: Oh my goodness! Let me have it! Mmmmm... Big League Chew, grape flavor. None for you, Luke Perry. You're lucky we let you clean the lab toliet.
LP: Yeah. I know. Ugh! There, I can finally breathe.
DBH: Hey did you give any thought to doing that biography of Jim Varney? Beaker and I just love those Earnest movies. Beaker can quote every line in Earnest Goes to Camp and Earnest Scared Stupid.
LP: Wow. That is amazing. Yeah. I'll have to talk to my agent tomorrow.
DBH: Ok. Let's see here. Damnit! I forgot to put buttons and a screen on this thing. How do I know if it is working?
LP: I thought you said it if was smoking then it was working.
DBH: Yeah. That's right. You are so much better than Beaker.
LH: Aww... shucks! You think so?
Bkr: Mem! (pant)
DBH: Oh look who woke up! If it isn't the most unreliable lab assistant ever. Way to wake up after we completed the experiment Beaker!
Bkr: Meme?
LP: Yeah. I have to admit that I'm suprised too. But he did it! The random pseudo-facts generator works.
Bkr: Memem?
DBH: Yes, Beaker that is correct. Global Warming is a myth! Al Gore is a liar! The Bushies are going to be so happy with this news. Maybe this time, Karl Rove will send over the unexpired McDonalds coupons.
Bkr: Mmemem! Mememem!
DBH: Well, that is all for today. Remember everyone, Science proves what you want to believe if it doesn't then you have a duty to change the results. That's how intelligent design was formulated!
Tags:
* comedy * humor * funny * silly * politics * president * george bush * republican * democrat
* conservative * liberal * congress * entertainment * pop culture * Muppet * Jim Henson
* Bunsen Honeydew * Beaker * Science * Global Warming * Al Gore * Technologoy * pollution
* Luke Perry * 90210 * Beverly Hills * celebrity * actor * gum * Big League chew * 80s
* pseudo-facts * machine * Everwood * random * smog * Jim Varney * Earnest Goes to Camp
* Earnest Scared Stupid * lab assistant * experiment * Karl Rove * McDonald * Intelligent Design
I'm Dr. Bunsen Honeydew of Muppet Labs Inc. guest reporting for Life is Crap. Today we will be testing my random pseudo-facts generator, which I created to disprove Global Warming. Beaker, can you get retrieve the machine?
Bkr: Mememe?
DBH: Yes, right now. You can watch the rest of the Everwood Series Finale later.
Bkr: Sigh. Memmeme (pant) (pant) Memme
DBH: As you can see, I had to make the machine very big to accomodate more randomness. Anything can happen once we plug this baby in. Who knows, it might even work!
Bkr: Mememe!
DBH: Ok good. Let me put on my goggles. Beaker do you have your goggles on? Silly me, I never bought you any. Ok. Go ahead. Plug it in.
Bkr: Memmemem! Memmeme!
DBH: Of course, it's suppose to emmit smoke! Every pseudo-facts generator ever created spits out at least 8 tons of smog per minute. My model does 9! My heavens, it works! I built something that works!
Bkr: Memememe! (pant) Mememe! (sigh)
DBH: Oh right, I should put on my oxygen mask. Sorry Beaker, only scientists get oxygen masks.
Bkr: Gasp! Memm! Gasp!
DBH: Geez Louise, what a baby! Now is not the time to take a nap Beaker! Beaker? Beaker? Sigh. I guess I will have to get Beaker's replacement 90210's Luke Perry. Luke, come in here.
LP: Hi Doctor. Can we open the windows? It's a bit smokey in here.
DBH: I guess, but it will make the experiment a little less successful. Go ahead.
LP: Hmmm... someone jammed gum in the latch.
DBH: Oh my goodness! Let me have it! Mmmmm... Big League Chew, grape flavor. None for you, Luke Perry. You're lucky we let you clean the lab toliet.
LP: Yeah. I know. Ugh! There, I can finally breathe.
DBH: Hey did you give any thought to doing that biography of Jim Varney? Beaker and I just love those Earnest movies. Beaker can quote every line in Earnest Goes to Camp and Earnest Scared Stupid.
LP: Wow. That is amazing. Yeah. I'll have to talk to my agent tomorrow.
DBH: Ok. Let's see here. Damnit! I forgot to put buttons and a screen on this thing. How do I know if it is working?
LP: I thought you said it if was smoking then it was working.
DBH: Yeah. That's right. You are so much better than Beaker.
LH: Aww... shucks! You think so?
Bkr: Mem! (pant)
DBH: Oh look who woke up! If it isn't the most unreliable lab assistant ever. Way to wake up after we completed the experiment Beaker!
Bkr: Meme?
LP: Yeah. I have to admit that I'm suprised too. But he did it! The random pseudo-facts generator works.
Bkr: Memem?
DBH: Yes, Beaker that is correct. Global Warming is a myth! Al Gore is a liar! The Bushies are going to be so happy with this news. Maybe this time, Karl Rove will send over the unexpired McDonalds coupons.
Bkr: Mmemem! Mememem!
DBH: Well, that is all for today. Remember everyone, Science proves what you want to believe if it doesn't then you have a duty to change the results. That's how intelligent design was formulated!
Tags:
* comedy * humor * funny * silly * politics * president * george bush * republican * democrat
* conservative * liberal * congress * entertainment * pop culture * Muppet * Jim Henson
* Bunsen Honeydew * Beaker * Science * Global Warming * Al Gore * Technologoy * pollution
* Luke Perry * 90210 * Beverly Hills * celebrity * actor * gum * Big League chew * 80s
* pseudo-facts * machine * Everwood * random * smog * Jim Varney * Earnest Goes to Camp
* Earnest Scared Stupid * lab assistant * experiment * Karl Rove * McDonald * Intelligent Design
2 Comments:
HOLY sh*t !!!! The muppets are BACK!!!
I think I just licked the computer...
James and the Muppets are my favorites!!!
YAY MIKE!!
I'm glad Bunsen is back. Great Job!
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