Bush Threatens to Veto Lunch
Citing a high fat content, President George W Bush threatened to veto his lunch today. If so, it would mark the first time the president has used his veto since he took office.
"Look, I'm the guy who, uhhh, tells people want we eat. I'm the chef. And a little while later, ummm, the food...well, it's on a TV tray. But we must, uhhh, you see - some critics believe lunch deserves an up or down vote. But I'm the chef. We live in a post-9/11 world. If the Democrats want to, umm, uhh, well, I'm not going to vote to support the terrorists. If some of the fat is not trimmed...well, uhh, is it time for the Duke boys yet?"
As tensions mount within the White House kitchen, head chef Emeril is in the process of making all necessary arrangements. "I'm not too worried about the food being sent back. He's always threatening to send back food if we don't make what he wants. But I'll just send a red ball or a ball of yarn with his lunch that he gets too excited to even notice the food. I mean, my name's not even really Emeril. The real Emeril didn't want the job so I just decided to call myself Emeril and say Bam alot. 6 years later and he hasn't noticed the difference. And I'm a 68 year old woman!"
Luckily a crisis was averted as President Bush was found asleep in the pool of plastic balls when Emeril served the president's lunch of red soda and Animal crackers.
Tags:
* comedy * humor * funny * silly * politics * president * george bush * republican * democrat
* conservative * liberal * congress * entertainment * pop culture * fat * lunch * chef * TV
* television * Dukes of Hazard * Emeril * White House * animal crackers * kitchen
"Look, I'm the guy who, uhhh, tells people want we eat. I'm the chef. And a little while later, ummm, the food...well, it's on a TV tray. But we must, uhhh, you see - some critics believe lunch deserves an up or down vote. But I'm the chef. We live in a post-9/11 world. If the Democrats want to, umm, uhh, well, I'm not going to vote to support the terrorists. If some of the fat is not trimmed...well, uhh, is it time for the Duke boys yet?"
As tensions mount within the White House kitchen, head chef Emeril is in the process of making all necessary arrangements. "I'm not too worried about the food being sent back. He's always threatening to send back food if we don't make what he wants. But I'll just send a red ball or a ball of yarn with his lunch that he gets too excited to even notice the food. I mean, my name's not even really Emeril. The real Emeril didn't want the job so I just decided to call myself Emeril and say Bam alot. 6 years later and he hasn't noticed the difference. And I'm a 68 year old woman!"
Luckily a crisis was averted as President Bush was found asleep in the pool of plastic balls when Emeril served the president's lunch of red soda and Animal crackers.
Tags:
* comedy * humor * funny * silly * politics * president * george bush * republican * democrat
* conservative * liberal * congress * entertainment * pop culture * fat * lunch * chef * TV
* television * Dukes of Hazard * Emeril * White House * animal crackers * kitchen
posted by Tom G at 5/09/2006
1 Comments:
He's also the decider. We're dommed.
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