Pretty in Pink: Steff

I just got done seeing Pretty in Pink for the four thousandth time. What can I say? I’m addicted to the absurdity of these John Hughes films like Bush is addicted to oil. Anyways, I started wondering why Steff (James Spader) was so interested in Andie. He has a nice car, lots of friends, and a relatively attractive 30 year old girlfriend who goes bananas over him. Does he really want an untested girl with an old lady wardrobe and a chip on her shoulder?

In order to answer the question, I decided to analyze Steff beginning with his Miami Vice apparel. It takes a real man to wear crap, and crap is all that Steff wears. Whether he’s roaming the school hallway or drinking scotch with his buddies, a blazer is a must.

Apparently all the bad teens in the 80s wore their Sunday best while our heroes languished in less stellar threads. Remember Weird Science? Robert Downey Jr. was dressed to crash Bat Mitzvahs while Anthony Michael Hall couldn’t crash his baby cousin’s birthday party. I refuse to be shallow enough to think that a corporate inspired get-up made you a bad guy and it certainly did not answer why Steff was so enamored with Andie.

Then again, where was Steff’s parents this whole movie? The entire time he’s behaving like a Greek god, holding binge drinking events and mini-orgies without any repercussions or parental intervention. Perhaps what Steff was seeking more than anything was a positive role model and some discipline; perhaps someone that reminded him of his dear old Grandma. In order for this to work, he would also have had to contemplate making it to third base with grandma at least once. It sounds unlikely, but this is the exact scenario that drove Blane and Duckie to madly pursue Andie.

Tags and Links:
* Pretty in Pink * Molly Ringwald * John Hughes * Jon Cryer * Andrew McCarthy * James Spader
* Annie Pots * 80s * entertainment * movie * pop culture * funny * comedy * humor * silly * hollywood * Bush
* Republican * Anthony Michael Hall * Robert Downey * Weird Science