I Hate Backflips

Sometimes backflips matter as much as batting skills

Below are career statistics of 5 major league baseball shortshops. Even if you're not a baseball fan, I implore you to take a look and answer my request. Please rank the following players:

1. .262 BA, 1257 runs, 2460 hits, 28 HRs, 793 RBIs, 580 SBs, 13 Gold Gloves
2. .276 BA, 1647 runs, 3184 hits, 431 HRs, 1695 RBIs, 36 SBs, 2 Gold Gloves
3. .307 BA, 1245 runs, 1901 hits, 429 HRs, 1226 RBIs, 226 SBs, 2 Gold Gloves
4. .327 BA, 1736 runs, 3415 hits, 101 HRs, 1732 RBIs, 722 SBs
5. .274 BA, 1305 runs, 2583 hits, 512 HRs, 1636 RBIs, 50 SBs, 1 Gold Glove

I highly doubt anyone would pick #1. Sadly, that's what Fox Sports News did. I was flipping stations on Saturday when they were counting down the Greatest 10 shortstops of all time. Being a baseball fan, I watched and thought about how I would rank them. First impression was that the top 3 had to be Ernie Banks, Honus Wagner, and Alex Rodriguez. Guess my surprise when #5 was Ernie Banks. So I continued to watch until I had no idea who the top 2 were.

So who was #1? Ozzie Smith!!! Now, I understand that defense is an important part of the game and conventional wisdom has Ozzie being the best fielder of all time. But he couldn't hit. Looking at the rankings above, the difference in offensive statistics is staggering. I personally believe The Wizard of Oz is a borderline HOFer and definitely not the #1 shortstop of all time. I am outraged. But I guess that's what he gets for running out and doing a backflip every inning.

I Hate Ozzie Smith and I Hate his stupid Backflips!!!

BTW, here's the top 5 which corresponds to the stats above - I'll give Ripken #4 but he obviously just got #2 because he showed up every day. What a bunch of idiots compiling that list:

1. Ozzie Smith
2. Cal Ripken Jr
3. Alex Rodriguez (still active)
4. Honus Wagner
5. Ernie Banks

FYI, here's my unresearched top 10:

1. Alex Rodriguez
2. Honus Wagner
3. Ernie Banks
4. Cal Ripken Jr
5. Robin Yount
6. Barry Larkin
7. Alan Trammell
8. Ozzie Smith
9. ???
10. ???

Tags:
* comedy * humor * funny * silly * entertainment * pop culture * baseball * sports * Fox
* Ozzie Smith * Cal Ripken Jr * Alex Rodriguez * Honus Wagner * Ernie Banks * Robin Yount
* Barry Larkin * Alan Trammell * Robin Yount * home run * NL * AL