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Saturday, February 10, 2007

Corey Armageddon

We've been waiting for some sort of revival of all things Corey for a long time. Our anticipation is not by any stretch of the imagination over ambitious.

The truth of the matter is that you can't keep a good Corey down. Like the eventual rise of Steve Guttenberg, the Corey's are poised to take their rightful place as the top grossing actors of their generation.

There has been considerable amount of noise going around the internets about the two 80s thespians, which led us to believe that the Corey Armageddon was upon us. The only problem was that we had no idea what the revolution would look like.

That is how Corey trickery works. It deceives you and twists your perceptions of all things Corey. The public wrote them off after their string of terrible 90s films. Corey Haim was thought of as coke head who would never work again. Corey Feldman was a joke; a self absorbed Michael Jackson addict.

Why would the pair deceive us? Because they were sowing the seeds of their eventual rise! The greatest comeback story of our time: The Corey Armageddon! In order to become mega-stars they had to trick us into writing them off first.

We though Universal Groove would be the start of the Armageddon. We were wrong. We thought that Corey Feldman's band "Truth Movement" would trigger the Armageddon. We were wrong.

Our latest theory is that the "Two Coreys" will be the start. What is the "Two Coreys"? A loosely based reality show featuring Corey Haim and Corey Feldman on A&E. As humble as that sounds, it could become the greatest show on television.

The recipe is clearly right: One show, Two Coreys. Wow. I can hardly wait to watch it!

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3 Comments:

Blogger August Goddess said...

You know, I suddenly feel very pathetic that I was actually a fan of 2 Coreys. I loved their movies too. But then again, I was an unexperienced little girl. I wonder what would happen if I revisited those movies today.

Thanks for the warning on the Corey Comeback! Lets hope they have more to bring to the table because we little girls of the 80's are now advanced and expect a lot more....

what was I saying???

2/12/2007 09:50:00 AM  
Blogger Tom G said...

And one day a Corey will show them the way forward. And one day, another Corey will show them the way even further forward. And on the 7th day God rested knowing he could improve upon the Coreys.

Amen.

2/12/2007 06:29:00 PM  
Blogger Tom G said...

Typo:

And one day a Corey will show them the way forward. And one day, another Corey will show them the way even further forward. And on the 7th day God rested knowing he could NEVER improve upon the Coreys.

Amen.

2/12/2007 06:31:00 PM  

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